On Monday we reached our honorary halfway through the year mark. On July 1 each year I tend to evaluate where I am in that year’s word and make an evaluation of what needs to happen the last six months of the year to reach my goals. It is a tradition at the start of a new year to create resolutions. When we have the promise of a new year ahead of us, we can be over zealous about how much we can accomplish that year. This can be especially challenging if we are also in the depths of grief. When we never know when grief will hit us, all of these promises to ourselves can be easily undermined by our grief monster. This, in turn, creates frustration, anger, and sadness that we cannot fulfill all of these things we had set out to do. It may be hard to do, but one of the best things we can do for ourselves is to not set unreachable expectations for ourselves when we are struggling on our grief journey.
As you know if you read my New Year’s post this year, that I choose to live by a word instead of making a huge resolution. I started doing this the new year after my mom died. I knew everything in my world that following year was going to chaos and I knew I would not live up to making grandiose resolutions. So that year I chose a word, and every year following I have chosen a word to live by during the year. I will make goals, instead of promises, to work towards during those years. 2019’s word is success. I have been making small goals and doing my best to achieve them. When my grief monster is running a muck in my body, I know that I can take a break and not have to feel bad about not working out that day or doing something that my resolution daily requires from me.
As we cross into the second half of 2019, I hope that you can take stock of what you have accomplished this year while on your grief journey. If you have been able to get yourself out of bed and brushed your teeth on days you didn’t want to, I’m so proud of your courage to leave the safety of your warm bed. If you have made it back to work after a death of a loved one, I encourage you to keep going. If you have been helping others along their grief journey, I applaud your willingness to give back to others who are experiencing the road you have been on before. My wish for all of you is to have hope along the way as you are walking this grief journey. I hope that you are finding comfort in the small moments, achieving the small goals you have set for yourself. I am so proud of you for continuing to go on. Let’s see what you can do the last half of this year!